DINNER AT THE HARMONY INN (Zhong Dian)

It is difficult to explain why the first generation of Chinese food in Australia had been so universally Mundane. I imagine the following conspiracy scenario, perhaps in 1800AD:

A hush settled over the room as the chairman stepped up to the podium.
"Welcome distinguished Chefs of the G1000 summit. You have been invited here at the Emperors bequest - because you are the culinary cream of China.


The Emperor has a grand mission that you are part of. He seeks to bring Chinese culture to Australia, to every city and country town. All will know the glory of China."

A delegate Chef in the front row stood up,
"But sir," he protested, "I have completed my doctoral thesis in the subtleties of Szechuan flavour over the last 3500 years. Australia is a country of sheep graziers! How will they possibly appreciate our craft?"

"The emperor understands this," the chairman reponded, "and he has a new quisine designed especially for the Australian palate. In addition - you are to learn the names of these culinary masterpieces in the Australian dialect."

"Tell us of the emperors culinary creation," the protaginist Chef said - as he continued standing.

"Firstly - you are to forget all you ever knew about cooking rice. All rice is now to be served fried - with corn and peas."

All 1000 chefs had a look of abject horror on their faces.

"And if we refuse?" the querilous Chef asked.

"Then you will be chopped into pieces and fed to the Emperor's dogs.

Now we will learn the Australian dialect. Repeat after me: Mo flied lice?"

"MO FLIED LICE?"

" Bif wif bwack bin sos"

"BIF WIF BWACK BIN SOS"

"Swit sour pok"

"SWIT SOUR POK"

"Honey Kling Prons"

"HONEY KLING PRONS"

The rest is history.

Thankfully the Australian palate has moved on from there after the 80's and so has Chinese food in Australia.

The meal our host Sharlene served us tonight was amazing.